Another year and boy how things have changed. Some people know about some don't. A year ago I lived in darkness. Believing that hope and dreams were both impossible and unobtainable. I didn't think any of my friends were real, that anything anyone said was true, that any of my smiles were fake. In February of last year I was hospitalized for self harm. Believing the only thing that pain was my only comfort when I messed up. Diagnosed with clinical depression. Though the hospital did help it was still an uphill battle for me. Every day for many months was trying to find a reason I deserved to exist. Those months of darkness though slowly the light started to return. I realized many things that simply I was blinded too.
I learned who my true friends were and what they really meant to me. That no matter what they are there even if it's just to make me smile and laugh with them for a day. That I will always have them and my family who will have my back even when I make mistakes. My mistakes that I make are no longer something that keep me down, but how I learn. I'm not perfect no one is. Though coming from a place where I didn't believe that I could have a real smile, it's nice to have a real one.
I wanted to share this with my fellow vVv members for a few reasons. First I wanted to say thank you. When I was down here I made an entry wondering if I should just resign and quit being part of this community. What I got wasn't what I thought. I got others who offered an ear and help, something I didn't think would happen. For me this place is a family as well as community. I remember back when I first joined I was nervous as hell to be honest. I never thought it would come to the day when I would actually be staff, which I couldn't help but smile all day. That's why I needed to say thanks. Also, I notice a few people on here who seem down like I was. This is my offer to you if you do need just someone to listen go ahead and contact me. A way of me giving back what was offered me before. Here's to many more awesome times with vVv no matter the branch. Good luck in all you're gaming.
I may not be the best at words but for those of you out there who seem to be down or loosing hope. The road ahead of you may seem dark, but don't focus on how dark it is. Focus on the light no matter how small.